"You shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you odd." ~Flannery O'Connor

Saturday, October 29, 2005

Floating the papacy

What if Jesus had handled the foundation of the papacy the way the Vatican has lately been handling the homosexual-seminarian issue? I just came across a dead-on satirical post from Lee Strong's From the Back Pew, imagining the whole thing in the form of a dialogue between Jesus and the Apostle John. The latter muses:

“Thomas? He’s so negative and cynical. He keeps saying things like “Prove it.”

“Hmm. You have a point. Of course, he is intelligent.”

“So is Matthew, but who’d listen to him.”


“Yes. He was a tax collector. I know he reformed and we’re supposed to forgive and all, but still, some don’t trust him.”

“Who doesn’t trust him?”

“Judas, for one.”

“Ah, yes, Judas. Sharp fellow.”

“Judas? Yes. Everyone respects him. You can count on him to get things done.”

“True, Judas has everyone’s trust.”

“I guess if you have to pick anyone, Judas would be a good one. He’s smart. He’s good with money. You get a sense he knows what he’s doing.”

Jesus chuckled.“Not like Simon,” he said. “He means well, but …”

John laughed.“Poor Simon. He keeps messing up. And there’s that mother-in-law of his. Oy! Oh, he tries hard, and everybody likes him, but he’s not the brightest fellow.”

“I like the fact that he acts with his heart and not just his head,” Jesus said.

“Head? Sometimes I think he has rocks in his head.”
Jesus nodded and smiled.“Rocks? Interesting description.”

“If you want my advice, Judas is your man,” John said.

Jesus sighed. “Yes, I think Judas is capable of playing a bigger role.”

“As for Simon,” John added, “well, heaven only knows what he’ll end up doing.”

I am rolling on the floor. So modern, so timeless.
blog comments powered by Disqus